This Is Why Tesla Will Accept Dogecoin
Hey everyone,
Tesla has captured the public’s imagination with a wave of innovation.
Now, it could be on the brink of accepting Dogecoin for vehicle purchases.
Let’s take a look at why Doge for Tesla is inevitable!
Tesla on cruise control
No company in the world right now is quite as captivating as Tesla:
In September 2020, Tesla held Battery Day to unveil revolutionary increases in EV battery efficiency.
In June 2021, Tesla held a Model S Plaid delivery event. The Model S is capable of reaching 60 mp/h in under two seconds and does a quarter mile in nine seconds, making it the fastest production car in the world.
Tesla's energy business made a major leap in 2021, with battery and solar sales tripling in Q2. The combination of Tesla's solar roof and Powerwall battery give customers the potential for energy independence by creating their own self-sustaining electrical grid.
By August 2021, Tesla racked up 1.25 million reservations to purchase its Cybertruck, which Elon said "looks like it was made by aliens from the future."
At AI Day in August, Tesla unveiled the Tesla Bot, the D1 computer chip used to run the Dojo supercomputer, and improvements in its Full Self-Driving software.
Tesla is nearing completion of its Berlin and Austin Gigafactories. Giga Shanghai has been ramping up production while a second Shanghai factory is rumored to be under consideration. By 2023, Tesla could be manufacturing two million vehicles per year.
In late October, Tesla reported all-time high vehicle deliveries and earnings, pushing its market cap past one trillion dollars as its stock surged to new all-time highs.
As a result of its success, Tesla passed Facebook/Meta to become the sixth most valuable company in the world.
More than any other company, Tesla has positioned itself to dominate markets for electric vehicles, AI, and energy for years to come.
There's just one issue: its business is conducted with rapidly depreciating fiat currencies and held in banks with negative interest rates.
Simply by holding cash, Tesla is losing money.
Dogeuendo
Because its supply is fixed and predetermined, Bitcoin is often viewed as a hedge against inflation.
Inflation has started to hit the headlines hard over the past couple months, meaning Tesla was well ahead of the game when it became the largest company in the world to hold Bitcoin on its balance sheet in February.
At the time of Tesla's $1.5 billion Bitcoin buy, it also started accepting Bitcoin for car purchases. The combined news caused the flagship crypto's price to rise $8,000 in a single day.
Surprisingly, Tesla backtracked its plans in May, pausing Bitcoin payments until the majority of mining came from renewable energy.
When Tesla put Bitcoin on hold, Bitcoin's price tanked under a predictable avalanche of media FUD. From the start, however, there were signs that Tesla was planning several moves ahead, and thinking bigger than just Bitcoin.
The first clue came the day before the pause announcement, when Elon tweeted a poll to ask if Tesla should accept Doge.
Two days later, Elon tweeted that he'd been working with Dogecoin Core developers to make Doge more efficient for transactions, but didn't reveal why he was so keen on improving the Doge network.
Since May, Tesla hasn't made any major crypto moves, but hints continue to accumulate that something big is afoot.
At the beginning of October, Elon tweeted a picture of his Shiba Inu Floki in the trunk of a Tesla.
A few weeks later, Tesla filed paperwork with the SEC stating "We may in the future restart the practice of transacting in cryptocurrencies (“digital assets”) for our products and Services."
Shortly after that, a Twitter user found code on the Tesla website containing the words "BITCOIN" and "SHIBA," the latter likely representing Dogecoin.
The code has since disappeared from Tesla's website but was archived on the Wayback Machine.
Further adding to the intrigue, another anonymous Twitter account claims to have discovered that the code linked directly to a Dogecoin wallet.
If Tesla has already built the code for Doge payments, Doge for Tesla could launch at any moment!
It's not personal, Dogey, it's strictly business
While Elon's affinity for Dogecoin is well established, accepting Doge makes sound business sense for Tesla.
The Tesla news alone could easily send Doge past a dollar.
Tens of thousands of loyal Shibes would suddenly have life-changing money. Many could become first-time Tesla customers.
By pumping Doge, Tesla would essentially be printing money for retail consumers, who could then use it to buy Tesla's vehicles.
Overnight, Tesla would become the largest Doge-accepting merchant in the world, lending impossible-to-buy credibility to the onetime "joke" cryptocurrency. The global financial system would have no choice but to sit up and take notice.
If Tesla decides to keep payments in Doge rather than converting back to dollars (as it did with Bitcoin) it could end up stabilizing Doge's price, in the process turning Tesla into the world's biggest Dogecoin whale.
On a more intangible level, Tesla embracing Doge—the ultimate anti-establishment asset—would be a giant raspberry to the legacy world which has laid siege to Tesla for well over a decade with a stream of bogus news stories, lawsuits, short selling, snubs, and other FUD.
What's not to like?
Tesla trickery
Tesla has no shortage of powerful antagonists: big oil, legacy media, hedge funds, and politicians have all put targets on Elon's back.
Lately, it looks like he's playing 5-D chess with his detractors.
In response to political debate about an unrealized gains tax on billionaires, Elon used a Twitter poll to propose selling 10% of his Tesla stock.
With the majority of participants voting "Yes," Elon started selling shares this week. 10% of his stake in Tesla equates to roughly $20 billion.
By voluntarily forking over somewhere between $5 and $10 billion in taxes, Elon demonstrated he was responsive to the public will.
The fact that he chose to abide by the results of the Tesla poll could be a hint that he plans to follow through on his earlier Doge poll as well.
The bigger question is what he's going to to do with the rest of the cash from the stock sale.
If he buys Dogecoin—effectively swapping Tesla stock for Doge—the purchase could help trigger Doge's run to a dollar. Incidentally, a subsequent Doge bull run could also recoup the money he paid in taxes.
Another hint about the future came in response to Monday's Dogecoin Core 1.14.5 update, which further reduced transaction fees and made the network more secure.
Elon called the news "Important," suggesting that the Doge network could soon have a reason for handling greater transaction volume.
No matter what happens, Elon appears to be in firmly control. In the last week, he's trolled Janet Yellen, the UAW, congressman Ron Wyden, Mark Zuckerberg, and Jeff Bezos while changing his Twitter name to 'Lorde Edge' from Trollheim.
No one, save maybe Elon, knows exactly when Tesla will finally accept Doge. But when it does, it'll go down as one of the greatest pranks of all time.
Doge Delivery
Tesla is fast becoming the most captivating company in the world.
Elon has been dropping hints for months that Tesla plans to accept Dogecoin for vehicle purchases.
Doge for Tesla makes great business sense, allowing Tesla to expand its customer base and skirt inflationary pressures.
Elon is the undisputed king of Twitter and master troll. When Tesla does finally accept Doge, it could go down as one of the most consequential practical jokes in history.
Dogey Treats: News Bites
Twitter is launching a crypto team.
Tom Brady explained why he owns a Tesla: "It's kind the direction the world is heading and I think for me it about being conscious about the impact we have on our planet."
The artist Beeple auctioned a work of sculpture and corresponding NFT for $29 million.
AMC Theaters is exploring how to accept Shib for payments, while Robinhood said they were in no rush to add Shib to their platform.
Robinhood's COO Christine Brown said Doge continues to function as an entry point for crypto.
NSA whistleblower Edward Snowden tweeted a message to the Apes Together Strong meme stock movement: "So when they change the rules to rug you: remember it wasn't an accident. Stay mad."
Coindesk did a deep dive into the phenomenon of tungsten cubes as a tactile meme.
Former doge fake CEO greg is branching out into iPad art, catching the attention of Twitter CEO Jack Dorsey.
Memes of the Week
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Disclaimer: This is not financial advice and I am not a financial advisor. The article above references an opinion for entertainment purposes only and it is not investment advice. Do your own research and consult with a licensed financial adviser before making any investment decision. Do not treat any opinion expressed in this newsletter as a specific inducement to make a particular investment. Content, news, research, tools, and securities symbols are for educational and illustrative purposes only and do not imply a recommendation or solicitation to buy or sell a particular security or cryptocurrency or to engage in any particular investment strategy. The information provided is not warranted as to completeness or accuracy and is subject to change without notice. The projections or other information regarding the likelihood of various investment outcomes are hypothetical in nature, are not guaranteed for accuracy or completeness, do not reflect actual investment results and are not guarantees of future results. All investments involve risk, losses may exceed the principal invested, and the past performance of a security, industry, sector, market, cryptocurrency, or financial product does not guarantee future results or returns. Dogecoin is a speculative and highly volatile asset susceptible to pump-and-dump schemes.
Disclosure: I currently own some Dogecoin, Bitcoin, and Ethereum. At the time of publication, Dogecoin is around $0.27 per coin.